10December2006 sunday
Today a special day for me, why? Bcoz today i got singing competition, final, which is a small 1, organized by a big company. Hmm,actually quite funny, about a month ago, 1 day i reached home at my mother's stall, my aunt ask me to go for the singing contest next day, then so lucky i get into final already.. hmm
The venue held at Bangsar shopping Complex -Star KTV, then i so touch bcoz my frens all pay Rm25 come to see me and support me T.T i was really nervous, when the competition going to start, my heart beats were fast, coz of nervousness..... then i tell myself i must not feel nervous, nervous cant make me win or sing well !
While im on the stage, whenever my hand begins shaking, i force myself not to nervous and continue to sing, whew, finally i did it, just the high note part a bit pitching , but i know i already done it better than usual~ hmm.. i know im safe already, i will be top 8 for the second round, i getting more nervous! coz i dunno whether i cantremember the lyrics! sigh, my fren said this 2nd song(fast song) i sing better than the 1st one, as Matt said, the more "Keo" in it, in the song, it's me that shows... haha.. Frankly speaking, i quite satisfy with my performance this time, compare with last time.. but maybe my singing skill not good enough or the performance wasn't hot enough, i only won the 2nd prize.. ya, i'm happy, but if can get 1st will be better, coz got cash....wakaka
But nvm, i get more experience this time i think next time could be better and more confident! im still young, i still got lot's of chance, so will do better next time, bigger formal singing competition next time ~ yea... maybe 1 day u'll see me in tv? who knows? wakaka... well.. now still wait for stpm results 1st lo...
okla, tired lazy blogging la... see my blog next time la :P

"How far can i go before i have to turn back?"

It's already 7 years, they're my closest friends for these years, but they don't really know what i am thinking. I never expect my friend to know or to guess what i think and what i thought, but i never realise they mind that they don't know what i think.

They said:" You've changed, Keo.."

"What? i've changed? In what way? i'm still the same person!?" I asked.

"You don't care your best friend nowaday.." YY replied.

"I do care all my friends, why do you say so? Did I done something wrongly? "

I admit that these days I'd change alot, but it's not like i don't care my friends, i'm just not like last time always in depressed mood, be more talkative and sometimes a bit hyper... Then i looked at them, they're like not so use to/ happy with the "present" me..

And then i think, what they expect from best friend? They want the "former" me? But i'm still the same person, just that what I'd experienced force me to change.. so i have to keep going, moving forward..

I don't want to step on a same place, the place that made me sad;

I don't want to listen to the same song, the song that made me cry;

I don't want to look at the same picture, the picture that made me depress;

I don't want to do the same move, the move that made me looked like an idiot!

If the past will just form a "depressed-mood" me, If the past will just form a "crying" me, If the past will just form a loser... Why should I turn back? But i wonder, how far can I go before i have to turn back?

I want to get what I want and what I like, nothing much,
at least, confidence! at least, happiness!

But sometimes i scared, i worried,
what if I don't see what I want to see when i go further?
what if i don't get what i want when I moved forward?

And then I think, If we never try, we never learn! If we never try, we won't know the result!

No one want to be a useless person, I don't know what I can achieve, but at least i try! Some people think it's more safe to stay at the same place, but since i've moved forward, why pull me back?

It's already midnight now, dunno y dun feel like sleeping , dunno what to do so late at night huh..
it's already 2 weeks since deepa-raya holidays, this 2 weeks i didnt study much, why, i just dun have the mood to study! hmm, tmr noon waiwai n pooi san are going to come my house to do some maths, a small study group. Hmm.. i spent alot these holiday, really need to save up abit.
sigh, y i feel so lonely leh... y i so lazy leh...
b4 holiday, i know there's an audition for the performance for one of the sch teacher's retirement, so i asked matt whether want to join me to perform, i play bamboo flute and he play guitar, play an chinese oldies "ya lai xiang", but then we dun have time to practise, so we didnt went for the audition, but then we got an idea, since our form teacher will be leaving MBS, so y don we just dun play it in class on the coming monday, coz we're having class party that day.
so yesterday(friday) i went to his house, i try to follow matt's version of "ye lai xiang", it's like abit jazzy, but i nv play song in that feel b4, so it's quite hard for me, lol, so we rearrange abit, try to match flute and guitar perfectly.. then we recorded it, although the recording not so nice, coz lots of mistake :P, only practise for 1 hour ma..haha.. and we also decide to sing a medley song too.. hope they all will enjoy it and like it...hehe...

same story almost everyday, this morning i overslep again, it was my mom that wake me up! but i was so tired, and u know what, the such bad air quality that thanks god lah, cause by the stupid damn Fu*k Indonesian, if wanna burn burn their own house la stupid! This is another kind of selfishness that they never think of other people's feeling, they think the earth is not belongs to them too? even dogs, sometimes, after shitting will try to cover with sand or mud; they're like shitting anywhere in their house and in the end everyone who live in there are going to suffer!
i Hate haze, it just make me feel so uncomfortable, more than anyone else except the asthma patient i think. This may because of when i was a kid, i had been coughing for years until 9 years old, thats y i think my respirator not so good. But i still have to go to school, since it's already late, and monday will be assembly for the 1st period, so i do everything "gently", no need to rush, lol. Before i leave the hosue, i open the cupboard and take a mask, in case i really need it, and i scared i will faint at the roadside.
when the lift opened, it is so obvius the haze index is high, everything so white and so blur. Then i walked to the bus stop, i just can't stand, i felt hard to breath, immediately i took the mask out and wore it, even i look like an alien or insane. But i dun wish my friends in school to see me like that, so when i reached school i took off the mask and kept it in bag, then i walked to the late comers' queue .
I really dunno understand this headmaster, i actually reached on time, i mean few minutes before the 1st period ends, but the assembly was longer than usual, wei~ what the Mr. WCK was thinking huh? purposely choose this Hazy days to have such a long assembly and want to kill we all ah? I think no school will have such open air assembly during this time lo! hello, sorry la Mr. WCK, if wanna die please jump down from any building la, we dunwan to die or sick during this time la, STPM and SPM are so near... wuwuwuw, nervous~
everything so bad this morning, and the worst is, my closest mate in class, khsien n matt, both of them absent, mama, i dun wanna sit alone la~ y they left me alone... T.T so i sit with Yik Lam, lol~ it's kinda bored bcoz usually with khsien n matt, we'll have lots of lame joke, or some funny thing to share, so i told yik lam a very lame thing i done that day, here's it is :
"yik lam, that day i went to oldtown kopitiam with matt n his gf, khsien, pooisan n wai wai rite" i said "i ask matt's gf a very lame question!"
"what is it?" He asked with full of curiosity, bcoz he likes cold jokes and IQ question very much.
" i asked her very seriously, if one plus one equals to two, then one plus three equals to what?" i replied.
same response with evon, Yik Lam not sure with the answer that appeared in his mind, then he asked " then?"
"She answered me with no confident and suspiciously, she said: " i replied.
Yik Lam was so excited, and full with expectation, he wanna knows what is the answer i replied her. I turned my head to him, and look in his eyes, then i replied, " the answer is... ya la, it is four"
lol.. immediately he laugh until tears come out, i dunno he'll have such a great response, if i tell khsien this kindd of lame joke, im sure he'll stared at me and say" wei~ enough la!" and then drops head.. lol...
well, actually nth much happened today, just i hope that the haze problem get better, and hope i got mood to do revision la~ i havent start yet man~~

Read More 0 comments | Posted by -KeO- |

friday, mid autumn, or we call mooncake festival.. after school, the girls from my class celebrate wenlissa's bday in Oldtown kopitiam at petaling street. they ask me to go along, then i join them (coz im quite close with the waiter/waitress there, they want me to ask for going upstairs, coz normally they wont open if downstairs still hav seat.. lol.) and so then me the only guy there, quite bored, but still got sook wah talk with me.. lol. i know sook wah for almost 7 years, when form 2 that time, i think that she's quite cute 1, then after that feel that she's quite childish, but Now i think that she's not actually childish, just abit talkative sometimes , lol..
at night, bcoz my parents off day, so they cook.. lol, and my aunties also come my house for dinner.. hoho.. but lately, duNo y, i cant eat too much, just like no appetite.. hmm.. but this year mooncake festival quite bored.. after the dinner, watch tv loh.. then my sister play games, yahoo game, called big money, then i also play lo.. then i get high scores 20thousand sth, haha, my sister " mm gam yun", she want to get higher score than me, so she keep playin and dun let me to play.. lol. but still, till Now my name is still the 1st in the ranking.. wahaha..
2nd morning, too tired for me to wake up, but i must wake up, coz i have to go to timesquare to meet my frens, they going to sing karaoke, celebrate fren's bday lo.. sigh.. so many fren bday huh.. but that morning i really not feeling well, feel like vomiting.. but still i attend lo.. when i reach there, i didnt see any of my fren, coz i am late for half an hour, so i call them, oh, they are in sg wang .. they wanna go redbox.. so since im in timesquare , i wanna reload my digi number, and wanna register, so i go to digi centre and register 1st only i go sg wang meet them.. when i see them , oh.. all guys there.. so bored :P i tot will have some girls..lol but nvm lo, still can have fun rite.. we get a quite big room, the MK room.. yea, very nice, but when the fried rice i ordered is served, i have no appetite to eat.. so i eat little only.. then sing some new songs.. and my favourite songs.. lol. but duNo y ah.. a few song very cacat 1, the song like suddenly hang, or the music is faster than the lyrics.. then how to sing ????
after that, around 3 pm, i can't stand, really not well, so i go home 1st.. straight away i sleep on the bed.. but when i aake again, very suffering, feel like vomit, but nothing come out.. so i rest in the living room, go to toilet so many times, but didnt vomit.. my father suggests me to buy soft drink, but i not dare to leave the house, i scared will vomit .. so i ask my father buy for me..
my father buy 100plus for me, after finish it, i straight away go to toilet and vomit, and feel much more better... then i sleep again.. on the sofa.. the whole night i am so blur and suffer... hmm.. cham ah~~ but i use to it already, coz everytime i sick i also alone at home.. hmm

1/10-2/10, year 2006

well, this is my first time here, i've just signed up here, am i welcomed? lol..

1st of october, sunday, i woke up at 10am, for what? i went to Neway karaoke with my fatty cousin, lol, long time never sing karaoke already! We didnt book the room, the receptionist said it's fully booking and said that we can try to walk in, so we went there to try our luck~ oh ya, we're so lucky, we got a room to sing, wakakaka.. i was so hungry and the 1st thing i do is to order food~~ haha,
ofcoz, while waiting i went to took the salad buffet ..yoohoo~ but actually the salad just very simple 1, nth special.. hmm, but the coffee was nice.. hehe.. i ordered X.O. fried rice, oh, it's good, not bad.. not Very delicious la, but at least better than i thought, maybe u all can try it next time ~

After 2 hours singing, i accompany my cousin to sungai wang, she wanted to buy something and go to saloon to set her hair and make up ( bcoz yesterday nite was my another cousin's wedding's day, i wonder why he choose sunday night to have this wedding dinner.. hmm.. many of us still have class on monday neh~ lol.. ) but when my cousin said my hair was messy, i felt like dunwan to stay in sg wang longer, i went home myself and left my cousin alone, i'm bad rite? but we both live nearby only, 5 minutes can reach home already ma..

I got nth to do at home and i was bored, so i switched on the laptop and start playing Mahjong game.. hehe.. it's fun but actually i duno how to play, so i was playing and learning.. but if you want me to play the real 1, i think for sure i will lose all my money.. lol. Then my mom came back, she non- stop nagging me.. asked me to take bath 1st before my father back to home~ until i cant take it anymore i exit the game and took my bath.. after that, ofcoz i continue my game..lol.. then only wait for them to be prepared to go for the wedding dinner.. actually the dinner time "printed" in the invitation card is 6pm start, but we left our house at 7pm, and reach there at 7.30pm, and i think we're the last guests to reach.. hmm..

wedding dinner, ofcoz can meet my relatives again, and that means they asked me a lot of question again, u know la.. those auntie uncle.. sigh.. but 1 good thing is can gather with my cousins again coz we rarely have chance to meet with each other beside CNY.. i drank alot last nite, and i feel abit mabuk ad..(actually jsut abit dizzy la~) but not like my cousins, elaine, ian and so on.. elaine looks so blur and ian, his face was like a tomato.. lol..

the dinner ended around 9.30pm, surprisingly early rite? usually wedding dinner(from my experiece la~) will end around 10pm and last time my brother's 1 ended around 11pm.. lol.
when i reached home, i bought a canned nescafe , oh i shouldnt have bought it, the whole night i cant sleep so i watch the HK drama series until midnight 3am.. i slept...ZZZzzzZzz..

7.30am, i opened my eyes, oh darn it, i overslept again? i was so tired and i decide not to go to school, i continued sleeping..ZZzzZZzzz... 1pm, i woke up.. i took my handphone, 1 new message, from matthew, the sms was like this>> " hey, are you going to Chin's class today?"
oh my goodness, i forgotten today is PMR exam, and we got 3 days holiday.. only our class that have accounts extra class, oh, luckily i was not ponteng school, just ponteng extra class.. lol and the accounts class just a few hour.. aiyo.. nvm la... bcoz im going to give up my account for stpm ad, i still got 4 other subjects ma.. lol..